Monday, August 17, 2009

Hello, My Name is Gabi and I am a Twitter-holic

I admit it.  My tweets were getting out of hand.  But honestly, the 140 character limit is stifling my creativity and ability to fully inform people what I was doing every second of the day.  

140 characters is definitely NOT enough to tell people this VIT (Very Important Tweet)  I was just about to post:

"That I just made a delicious bean salad with black beans, corn, cherry tomatoes, red onion, peppers, avocado, cous-cous, cilantro, lime juice and salt and pepper, salmon marinated in a papaya mango salsa grilled to perfection on my George Foreman with a side of broccoli freshly steamed..... in the microwave.  The meal took me maybe 15 minutes to make.  Yes that's right Rachel Ray and your 3o Minute Meals, I just one uped you.  Eat my shorts."

I'm just kidding I would never tweet that much.  That's what blogs are for.  

No seriously, this TMIOT (too much info on twitter) trend is getting out of hand.  One of the reasons I stopped following a bunch of people, is just how narcissistic people are.  Like no one gives a crap that you are eating, sleeping, watching TV, etc.  Unless you're John Mayer.  Then I want to know what you do every second of your day and I'll still find it entertaining and hysterical. 

But then there are people like Spencer634:

@Spencer634 tweets:  "I need a guy to F%&@ me Monday through Friday.  Please be disease free and happy"

WOAH Spencer634 TMI!!  I mean don't we all want that? That pretty much describes the perfect mate.  Disease free, happy, and great in bed. But why does Spencer634 only want this dream dude Monday - Friday?  What about the rest of the week?  Does she need to take a breather?   Read a book?  Go to Church?  Or maybe that's when she screws her Saturday-Sunday diseased unhappy guy?  I'm starting to think Spencer634 isn't a real person.  Is this what defines a sex-bot? 

But the sad thing is,  I think twit-aholics actually think that other people care what they are doing every second of the day.  Twitter really should change it's prompt to "What are you doing?  If you don't have anything funny or intriguing to say, don't say it at all."

It's the same thing with Facebook Photos.  I love these people with 1034 photos of themselves and half are just of them taken in their Mac Photo Booth.  Yes I too take the classic "thug life" and "sexy pose" photos on my PhotoBooth in the privacy of my own home, but I sure as hell don't tag those photos on Facebook for all of my 856 "friends" to see. 

I think Janeane Garofalo on Jimmy Fallon said it best, when giving her two cents about Twitter:

"I have the decency to hate myself.  Young people don't have any grasp on self loathing and how to censor"

You are so wise Janeane.  Just for you, I WILL have the decency to hate myself and self censor.  But first let me turn off E!  

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